my pathetic life

This is a note written to myself as to inform that I am indeed pathetic. If you are not me and you are reading this please do so it will help you feel better about yourself. You may have noticed that I am writing my life story on a stcky note (in which the the real world equivalent would be a post-it.) That is due to the shortness of the interesting parts of my existence. This may seem gloom to some, but it is not so. I have been conditioned to be meaningless. And as such have found it to be rather "enjoyable". (Some words from thus forward may be in quotes due to my warped view of reality. e.g.. staring at a white wall for hours on end might be considered "enjoyable".)

Now to write the second paragraph. The second paragraph is meant to describe one of the leading arguments of the thesis statement. And I believe that talking about what a second paragraph is meant to do I am indeed fulfilling it's purpose. So to get back to what I was talking about. A second paragraph is meant to tell the reader why he thinks he is undoubtedly right. In this case I am trying to prove that I am boring. Do you get the point of this paragraph?

Onto my "warped reality". I am "weird". But more importantly I am more "interesting" than you in every-way. (If you have forgotten I am writing this to "myself" and you are indeed a peeping tom.) I have "good looks"; at least it appears so in all the specially designed fun house mirror all around my house. I am also "smart". Not just tech-book "smart", but nonsense "smart". If you know anyone that is smarter than me you must not be me, so you really shouldn't be reading this seeing as it is not addressed to you. I have decided that I should finish this this paragraph saying that I am the nicest guy I know and if you don't agree I hope the plague kills your family and you are forced to live the rest of your days knowing that it was all because you chose to object to a crazy "man" claiming that he was nicest guy he knew.

You may be wandering why I am so pathetic if I am indeed great in so many ways. That's a good question. After all that is why you are still invading my privacy. So the least I could do would be answer you query. I have done nothing this summer. Not just your travel around the world meeting all kinds of new "people" nothing. But some really hard core nothing. e.g. " ". You may feel a small amount of pity for me or think that I'm "lame", but you seem to have "forgotten" I'm not "like you" I'm "crazy". I'm used to being bored. I bask in it. I have more time to appreciate the little things. Like sleeping in a "little longer". Forgetting to eat or bathe; Or remember that there really is an "outside". After all it's the little things that count, not friends, family, or "women". People need to take big chunks out of there life just to waste it. Skip a their birthday and just spend it in their room not getting out of bed. Or take all that time misspent eating and just look at it and put back in the fridge. After all if you actively participate in life you might just lose.

*Some, in fact most, statements may be false. Readers discretion advised.